Ellie And Joel Part V : The whole truth
by Karinne
Summary: Another version of my story "The truth". Ellie isn't really happy with Joel in this one. Rated M for language.


**Author's notes** : This is basically the same storyline as "The Truth" but with a different reaction from Ellie. I particularly liked writing this one.

Ellie was reading a Stephen King book on the porch of their house. Joel and she had been living in this cute but not that small wooden house ever since they've come back from Salt Lake City, five years ago. It was already completely furnished, and had two bedrooms and one bathroom. From the very beginning, Ellie had asked Joel if they could still sleep together. She's always felt safer with him around. He had agreed immediately, not even wondering her why. From time to time, especially during that time of the month, Ellie slept in her room. But it never lasted very long, the nightmares kept ruining her sleep quite quickly.

Right now, she couldn't really focus on her book. Now that she was grown, she thought way too much about the day they found the Fireflies. She knew deep down that Joel had lied to her, but why? What could have been so horrible that she couldn't have stood at the age of 14? Or what was he so afraid of? Her reaction, maybe.

As she was deeply thinking about this, her eyes turned to him. He was working with some other people, assembling some wood planks and painting them as the community continued to build new houses for other survivors. In spite of his age – 52 – he was still in good shape, lifting several planks at a time and not even showing exhaustion dislike some other men on the site. She found herself staring at his muscles like a perv and quickly looked back at her book when his eyes met hers.

"Damn!" She thought. What was he going to think now?

A few seconds later, from the corner of her eye, she saw Joel walking close to her. She hoped he wasn't going to talk about how she'd been staring.

"Hey," he said as he sat next to her.

"Hey," her voice was weak. She cleared her throat.

"What do we have here?" He asked, taking the book off her hands to see the cover. "Good choice, loved this author."

"Yeah, he seemed to know how to make you feel uncomfortable and scared."

"Yeah… Are you alright? I see you look away from your book from time to time, something on your mind?"

How to tell him? Ellie just looked in his eyes for a moment, biting her lip.

"I'm just thinking… A lot…"

"About what? He looked worried now.

"I know you didn't tell me everything about the Fireflies. And I wanna know the truth Joel."

He almost gasped, certainly dreading this day would come, the day she'd ask questions. But he had never wanted to tell her the truth. He was afraid she would run away from him. He sighed deeply and closed his eyes. She noticed he suddenly looked actually old, and tired. Man, she hated seeing him like this and regretted asking him about the Fireflies.

"You're not a kid anymore, I owe you the truth I guess."

He paused to look at her and took her hand in his. Ellie noticed it was pretty warm.

"You almost drowned, I tried to bring you back but some Fireflies found us and knocked me out. When I woke up, I was on a hospital bed, Marlene was next to me and she had one of her guards with her. I asked about you, I wanted to see you because I was worried. She refused, telling me you were being prepped for surgery. The docs had found why you were immune, the Cordyceps had mutated and they needed to dislocate it in order to create a vaccine. That meant, they literally needed to take out your entire brain. I argued with Marlene, she told her guard to kill me if I tried to stay. I made my way to the operating room, got you in my arms and carried you out of the hospital through the parking lot…"

He paused, looking far away, overwhelmed by these memories, the fear he had felt at this time. Ellie looked shocked, frowning a bit.

"Then?"

"Marlene was in front of us, trying to change my mind about saving you. I… I shot her in the stomach, put you in the car and… shot her in the head."

Ellie withdrew her hand from his and her mouth fell open.

"You… You killed Marlene?" She said, appalled.

"The only reason I did this was because I didn't want her to ever come at you again. She didn't care at all about your life."

Joel knew Ellie was very upset right now, he could see this anger in her eyes. She got up and ran into their house.

"God damn it," he mumbled following her inside.

Some workers lifted their heads up, wondering what was going on. Joel didn't even talk to them and came into the house, hearing the bathroom's door slam.

He ran upstairs and knocked at the door.

"Ellie, babygirl, let me in."

"Get the fuck outta here!" She screamed, tears in her voice.

That was bad.

"I'm sorry Ellie, I… I didn't wanna lose you," he apologized, hoping she'll say something.

The door opened violently and he saw the tears had run down her cheeks. He felt an intense feeling of guilt invade his heart and tried to reach out to her. She stepped back from him, hurting him a little more.

"You sacrificed humanity for me? I can't… Why Joel? Why?" Her cracked voice made his eyes wet. How difficult it was to see someone you loved suffer.

"Because the world took me a daughter 25 years ago, I couldn't save Sarah and I couldn't emotionally afford to lose another daughter!"

Joel's voice cracked too, his voice muffled by the cries that devastated him suddenly. He had restrained these tears for so many years they were coming out as a continuous flow. He let himself fell to the floor, still crying.

Ellie remained still for a few seconds and fell to her knees, holding Joel in her arms while they both continued to cry.

She suddenly understood Joel's decision, as wrong as it may seem from an outside point of view. He had chosen her over everything else and she could only be grateful. Without him, she'd be dead. And it has never been sure they could create a vaccine. Guess they'll just have to wait until the Cordyceps ultimately disappeared of the surface of the planet – if such a thing could happen, it was a powerful fungus.

"I'm sorry I lied to you, Ellie."

"It's okay, I'm the one who's sorry for getting so mad at you. We… We should've come here right when you suggested it to me before going to the hospital. But we've had already made such a long way that I honestly believed it was worth a shot…"

They were both drying their eyes when Ellie began laughing.

"What's so funny?" Joel asked, smiling at her.

"We are pityful. Look at us, arguing and then crying our eyes out."

"It happens. Guess it needed to come out one day or another, right?"

She nodded and said: "Right."

"By the way, I thought you should know. Back when we went to Tommy's the first time and you thought I wanted to get rid of you. That was never the case. You were right, I was afraid of something. I was afraid of my feelings for you and how it would hurt me again if you ever got killed. I didn't have the strength to carry this burden on my shoulders."

"What made you change your mind?"

She remembered how happy she had been when he stayed with her.

"I looked at you, you seemed so… Hurt by my words. And I couldn't let myself away from you.

Ellie smiled at him and hugged him tight.

"Promise me one thing Joel," she said, moving her head to look at him.

"Anything."

"We'll stay together."

"That sounds good to me," he replied with a grin.

He kissed her cheek and kept her in his embrace, still both seated on the bathroom floor.


End file.
